Is the voice you use keeping you from falling in love?

 

What if I told you that changing your one-sentence delivery could significantly alter your dating experience?Would you squint and say, "Okay, now I've really heard it all!?" and roll your eyes?What will you require of me next?Paint my face orange and run triptogether.com three times around my house in reverse?"

In reality, that would be entertaining, however no, I won't request that you do that.However, I'm going to suggest that you begin paying close attention to how you sound when speaking with others, particularly when you're on a date.This is a crucial aspect of dating that is frequently overlooked.If you don't watch out, your manner of speaking can without much of a stretch give a misleading impression and mood killer the very individuals you need to draw in.

According to Dr. Albert Mehrabian, Professor Emeritus of Psychology and a pioneer in the field of understanding how effective communications are since the 1960s, any face-to-face communication essentially consists of three components:

• 7 percent of a message is conveyed through spoken words • 38 percent of a message is conveyed through your tone of voice • 55 percent of a message is conveyed through facial expressions These statistics indicate that your tone of voice and facial expressions have a disproportionately large impact on the messages you convey.Your date won't believe what you're saying if your body language and tone don't match.For instance, even if you say, "I would love to go out again on Friday night," your date will conclude that you aren't really interested in going out again if your face doesn't move and your voice is flat.

It's hard to change your voice tone or facial expressions, but I've noticed that changing your voice also changes your facial expressions.When I tell most of my clients that they need to pay more attention to how they sound to their dates, they don't like it.That's strange," my client Christine recently stated to me.My voice is who I am.What would motivate me to alter it?

I went on to say, "You frequently sound angry and accusatory when you are talking to me about men and your experience with online dating."The majority triptogether of people have no idea how they sound.They don't know that even if they try to act as though everything is fine, their true feelings will come across in their tone of voice if they are angry or disappointed about something.Men might be turning away from you because of the rage I can hear in your voice.I mentioned anxiety during the course of the conversation.Would you agree that you occasionally experience anxiety?I pressed.

Christine appeared to comprehend what I was saying at once.I do.I experience constant anxiety.At work, I feel under pressure;My family is pushing me to get married.Numerous individuals have expressed how anxious I can be.

"Your anxiety is heard in your voice, and I imagine that it can frighten those around you.Consider it this way:Music is like your voice.Techno has a driving beat that can make you feel jittery if you listen to it.Meditation music calms you down and makes you feel more at ease.

I imitated her voice to help Christine comprehend better.OMG!Is that how I really sound?""Her response wasIt's no surprise that no one has asked for a second date!"

This issue affects more people than just Christine.Most of us, in fact, do.Previously, my voice was condescending, authoritative, and lecturing.I once had a boyfriend who was so bad that he started walking backwards out the door and said, "Leave me alone, I can't listen to  triptogether.com Reviews you talk anymore!"Although it was one of my lowest points, I am fortunate to be able to laugh about it now.

But during my coaching sessions, I really started to realize how important tone is.The voices of specific clients would attract me closer, while the tone of different clients would push me back.Consider all of the various kinds of voices you encounter:bossy, sweet, cocky, arrogant, condescending, etc.Start listening to them and observing how they make you feel.Think about how this would affect someone you're dating or in a relationship with if you have a strong reaction to someone's voice.

Therefore, you might be wondering, "Lisa, how can I improve my voice tone?"The first thing to think about is that your voice tone directly reflects how you feel at any given time.Your voice will be filled with impatience if you are feeling impatient.Your voice will be filled with excitement if you are excited.Well, you get the idea. If you're angry...You need to channel your inner Gandhi if you want to sound more compassionate.You need to channel your inner Marilyn Monroe if you want to sound more sexy.Your voice will convey to your dates what you're going through on the inside.Therefore, if you want a second date with someone, don't just say it; instead, back up your words with your voice.